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A Valentine's Day true story: Love conqures all
by Saif-ud-din January 02, 2008I had just returned to Africa after completing my studies in England. My mother had invited her friends' family (including her 22-year-old daughter) for lunch. The occasion was to entertain my mother's friend's mother visiting from Pakistan.
After lunch, I asked the bubbly, chatty 22-year guest to go dancing with me in the evening at the local hotel. She accepted the invitation for our first date.
That evening I went to pick up the young lady at her mansion-like home. Whilst reversing my old 1958 VW Buggy near the gate, I smashed and broke an expensive garden bench - much to the chagrin of the security guard. For the next few years he never opened the gate for me and asked me to park my car outside the gate.
After a few years I proposed to the young lady at a Moroccan club, "Kasbah" (the tent) on a Valentine's Day and she cheerfully accepted.
And then our nightmare began. My fiancee's family had for a few years been ex-communicated by the Bohra religious priesthood for espousing progressive views and questioning the mullas/sheikhs. My family belonged to the orthodox wing of the sect. The mullas/sheikhs refused to marry us in the Bohra mosque and unsuccessfully coerced me to give up my fiancee. My family supported me but beseeched me to marry in the mosque.
After three years of intensive negotiations, my fiancee's 99 year-old granduncle who was an orthodox priest was allowed to give-away the bride but for an enormous sacrifice/price. The condition being, my in-laws and their immediate family were forbidden to attend any of the wedding rituals. They nobly and with dignity consented to these cruel conditions for the sake of our happiness and in deference to my mother's wishes and beliefs.
After our wedding, I did not sever relations with my in-laws, as commanded by the mullas/sheikhs. So they now started hounding my family. After my son was born, we immigrated with my mother. My daughter was born in our adoptive country. My in-laws have also immigrated. We recently celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. My son is a high school teacher and my daughter is in 2nd year university.
The mullas/sheikhs are still harassing my family (including my children). This has become a three-generational persecution by the Bohra priesthood. However, due to our mutual love and affection and the tolerance of our true, not fair-weather, friends and family we have survived the ordeal in our adoptive country much to the annoyance of the mullas/sheikhs.
Love has conquered all adversities thanks to Allah almighty subhanahu wataalaa, family friends and that Valentine Day's proposal twenty five years ago.
‘The worst vice of the fanatic is his sincerity. (And he goes through life, his mouth open and his mind closed.)’ - Oscar Wilde
